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Mark Of Darkness Pag.1 Rough [Storyboard] by Dex91 Mark Of Darkness Pag.1 Rough [Storyboard] by Dex91
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Pag.2:


Heya guys!

I finally decided to start drawing some comic pages for my Mark Of Darkness saga! :heart:

Here is the Rough for the First Page.. now of course the lines are so ugly that i can't even think of a word which suits their ugliness, and of course the drawings are very poor as well.
The Perspective is also quite flawed, especially the stairs and the side of the house in the second Panel.

But this is just a rough, my main concern here was to decide camera angles, choosing various types of shots, the layout of the page using the Panels...


If i recall correctly this is called a "Storyboard", so please let me know what you think about this judging the narrative aspect and how the page flows, which is the sole purpouse of a Storyboard!



Will probably submit the finished, well inked, refined etc page tomorrow, so stay tuned ad hope you like the fact that i began drawing the comic finally! :glomp:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconxxpuddingcupxx:
xXPUDDINGCUPXx Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013  Student General Artist
this is pretty interesting i do like the use of gesture here
Reply
:iconsuperdestroyer50:
SuperDestroyer50 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Well quick tip, when you re-do the page, maybe thin the thumb to make it more feminine like you wanted [and making the fingers less bent and crooked] this still looks amazing though
Reply
:iconmaxmilian1983:
Maxmilian1983 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hai usato una carta pių scura, da l'impressione di antico.
Reply
:iconwolfmessenger:
WolfMessenger Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013
yaaay!! ^-^
Reply
:iconkaisaru:
kaisaru Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
UGLY?! Reallyyy??? Your storyboard is great compare to the one I done! I can call my storyboard a pure ugliness then xD Honestly this is really good so far and I don't see any mistakes there : O Your storyboard is beautiful itself and the story that tells there is clear! :D Well Done! :tighthug: :heart:
Reply
:icon000skyarrow000:
000SkyArrow000 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Awesome...^^
Reply
:iconblueriza:
blueriza Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2013  Student General Artist
come inizio č interessante :)
Reply
:iconohitsuji101:
ohitsuji101 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
this is going to be awesome!
and the lines are not that ugly if you wanna see ugly see me speed draw OH MY GOD i almost killed my self:fear: just by looking at it....anty way getting off topic awesome first page cant wait to see more:thumbsup:
Reply
:iconchrisbreen13:
chrisbreen13 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student General Artist
Dude, I've got a feeling this is going to be eipc :)
Reply
:iconaqua31798:
aqua31798 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
*reads description* ugly? UGLY?????:icondotdotdotzplz:....:icononisquirtplz: o, PLZ. HONEY. you might need glasses because, although its a rough draft, the drawing and artwork in this first page is AMAZING. The pencil-work is beautiful and the backgrounds/scenery is SO DETAILED OUO and lol i honestly didn't notice there was anything wrong w/ the steps until you pointed it out >.< so GREAT JOB :icongreatjobplz: as for the story itself~ as far as i can tell it flows very nicely :3 and WHOSE HAND IS THAT MUST SEE NEXT PAGE T-T
Reply
:iconimperfectpariah:
ImperfectPariah Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Everything already seems fine in the first panel, and yes, the perspective in the second panel is a bit off, but you already seem to have noticed the area of concern. You are on the right track, and I can't wait to see the final results! :aww:
Reply
:iconkittykitt117:
KittyKitt117 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student Digital Artist
WhoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH O___O So much lines it's beautiful. ;w;
Reply
:iconnaomichii-na:
NaomiChii-na Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Awesome!
Reply
:iconc00kie-l0ver:
c00kie-l0ver Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student General Artist
oh lala~
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thankies!
Reply
:iconoolouoo:
OoLouoO Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist
Molto bello!
Mi piace la composizione della pagina!
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Grazie mille!
Reply
:iconoolouoo:
OoLouoO Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist
Di niente! ^ ^
Reply
:iconmnjanderson55:
mnjanderson55 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Sweet artwork!
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thankies!
Reply
:iconmnjanderson55:
mnjanderson55 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
No problem! :)
Reply
:icontheredgarnet:
TheRedGarnet Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
This is so awesome!
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thankies!
Reply
:iconray6ray:
ray6ray Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Nice job! I can't wait for the next page! ^w^
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thankies!
Will release some more storyboards soon so stay tuned :glomp:
Reply
:iconray6ray:
ray6ray Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
No problem! ^w^

Yay! :hug:
Reply
:iconperianth5:
Perianth5 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student General Artist
I love the way this is done! It's only rough, but I love the way the lines are really sketchy, it gives such personality to the page!
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:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you, i'm glad you like it despite its sketchyness! xD
Reply
:iconperianth5:
Perianth5 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student General Artist
You're welcome! :XD:
Reply
:iconlinkgirl15:
linkgirl15 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Looks epic
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Why, thank you!
Reply
:iconlinkgirl15:
linkgirl15 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Welks
Reply
:icondondalier:
dondalier Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Coming from a comic geek from waaaaay back: I'd say it shows real promise. Panel 1 is a great perspective of the town. What I would change? Put the person looking out the window in the scene. Remove the hill coming into the middle of town and place it behind the building and move the castle up the hill. Everything else in the scene looks great. Add shading (determine where the sun is) and voila! Panels 2 and 3 (the eyeball panels): Interesting but, I can't imagine why they'd be here without actually reading the story (more on this in a minute). Panel 4 has great perspective and mood. I would consider adding a dog or something interesting in the left corner (maybe show someone playing and laughing to show a contrast between him and others around him). Panel 5: Pull the camera out on this and show the mood of the people and not just the gesture. Always keep in mind that your storyboard should be able to tell the story without explanation as to what is happening. Think silent movie where the camera zooms in on a persons expression to "show" what the're going through. Lighting and angles were very important for setting the mood and telling the story. Long winded comment, but, I hope this gives you something to think about. Glad to see you're really getting this down on paper and flushing out new ideas for this. Stay with it!!!
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Aaaww, i'm really flattered, especially because this is coming from you!
Thank you, really, this made my day :glomp:


You're totally right about Panel 1, i can't believe i hadn't put that person!
Since i was thinking of the usual Establishing Shot, i focused too much on the landscape and didn't see that actually putting that person would have achieved a much better effect.
Thank you, i surely will add him.

As for the hill coming to the middle of town, it actually is.. a very quickly sketched branch! xDD
Sorry, my bad, the drawings are horrible.
I was planning to make it look more like a branch in the refined version. xD
And the castle.. there should be no castle, maybe you are referring to the tower on the right.
Well, it actually is just a watch tower (i think that's how it is called in english, right? the tower from which guards check if everything is fine)but now that you make me think about it, watch towers also would be much more effective if placed up the hill.
Also, adding a castle on top of the hill is a great idea: just like in medieval times, hills are the best places to put a castle on, both because of the view and the strategic/tactical advantage given by the height.. it also makes defending the castle way easier.
Every village should have a castle, i shall put one indeed, so thank you again :glomp:

Regarding the eyeball Panels, i think the one of the person looking out the window should have a meaning if i add that person in the first establishing shot as you suggested, shouldn't it?
While the one about Dex should be easily understandable because it is near Panel 4, should look linked to Panel 4 because it is a detail of the guy sitting there (also, it should be raining to strenghten the mood)

Also, i apologize once again for the bad drawings and the fact that i intended to refine it later, but.. this should be the period of the Great Starvation, hence there should be no happy kid around, Dex isn't the only one sad.
There should be despair and chaos around him; i intended to add the chaos and the despair in the refined version xD (starting from panel 1, in which everything looks intact and there's no trace of despair for the moment)


In Panel 5, the hand should actually be the one of the Soldier's Wife (the two that will accept him).
It indeed looks WAAAY too masculine, but i left it as it was because it was a miracle that i at least made the hand actually look like a hand.
So i intended to refine later as well, and draw it as a feminine hand.
Also, would have been more clear that it was on the shoulder of his husband.

By the way, Panel 6 (next page) should cut from a Close Shot (Panel 5) to a Medium Shot, in which both of the spouses are seen near the window (where the husband was looking at Dex from) and it is clear that the hand was of the wife, because it is still there.
Imagine their two silhouttes, seen from the back or some angle which shows mainly their back, against the landscape seen from the window.
Do you like what you see?
So yeah, i thought it would have been cool to show the hand first in a Close Shot and then cut to a Medium Shot to contextualize xD


In the end, i'd like to say that once again i totally agree with you, as i'm following the same principle: a good page should tell the story without any dialogue at all.
And that's why i in fact decided to show the hand of the wife on her husband's shoulder instead of making her say "I know what you are thinking right now. I approve"
I hope the scene came out the way i intended it to and actually is interpretable as i said xD

Please let me know what you think about all this, looking forward to your reply..

It is and always will be a pleasure reading one of your incredibly constructive comments! :glomp:
Reply
:icondondalier:
dondalier Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You're drawings are'nt bad. You just need to tighten up the pencils. Most people have a hard time with perspective and backgrounds (I would fall in that category), you seem to have a firm grasp of it. I have a suggestion for you to help with the story layout. Draw all your story boards out in thumbnail sketches from beginning to end, like this: [link]. When doing this make a note to determine the light source direction for proper shading. Also, a story is usually 17 to 20 pages (including the splash page). A had a hell of time with getting my story under 20 pages. but, when I was done disecting the images of less importance, I found the story flowed better. Good luck.
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you once again, really!
Thank you also for the tip about the 17-20 pages, i'll see what i can do.

As for the thumbnail method, i have heard and read about it, it certainly is a useful method - nice link as well, interesting!
Reply
:iconiron-ghos:
iron-ghos Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013   Traditional Artist
COOL!!! :lol:
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thankiees!
Reply
:iconiron-ghos:
iron-ghos Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013   Traditional Artist
you're welcome :lol:
Reply
:iconammyna:
Ammyna Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Splendid page ! :)
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Why, thank you! :glomp:
Reply
:iconammyna:
Ammyna Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
You're welcome ! And thanks for the watch ! *o*
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
My pleasure! :heart:
Reply
:iconcaen-n:
Caen-N Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
really good layout design. and the rough ink work really set a cool mood to it
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you!
Reply
:iconwiggybee101:
wiggybee101 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
That's really cool looking ^^
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks!
Reply
:iconwiggybee101:
wiggybee101 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Welcomes! XD
Reply
:iconharrisons-forge:
Harrisons-Forge Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional General Artist
Looks good to me...but please remember the last comic I read was the Dandy or the Beano :giggle:
Reply
:icondex91:
Dex91 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh, no problem at all xD
And thank you! :glomp:
Reply
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